rejection

this post is going to be about rejection:

dear danielle of the future reading this,

right now, you are feeling all sorts of feelings of emptiness and denial and humiliation. you got denied from nyu and that is something you have to live with. sure, you have more college work to finish and you can't set all your eggs in one basket. yes, they accepted raul over you, but please please please listen to all of the nice things your friends and teachers tell you, even though the 'sorrry's' sound programmed from time to time and you think that most people are only thinking about themselves while trying to appear polite. this is a selfish and cruel bureaucratic world. right now you have tears rolling down your face because you have just come to a major conclusion about how pointless the entire process is. making fake friends, setting fake goals, and being upset about fake institutions who would prefer stuttering boys over you and your credentials. everything will work out, hopefully. even though i am writing all of this to my future self, i cant help but still feel pretty low.

why does this have to hurt so badly?

normal things to happen to me that prove that i am human too:

1. being broken up with
2. being rejected from college
3. really liking the new britney spears cd