it is beautiful outside!

it is gorgeous outside, even though unbearably windy, i almost got lifted off my feet, but i needed that sort of rush feeling! i like it like this, esepcially typing on my laptop and sunshine coming through the window instead of cloudy cloudyiness. i reread the bell jar in the last couple of days and i honestly dont know how i loved it so much as a naive 8th grader because i totally relate to it a lot more now than i could have ever as a 13 year old girl. its a wonderful story about a girl feeling trapped by expectations and society and boys and school and just the general pressure of living until she stopped feeling anymore, went to a insane asylum, and witnessed craziness all around her until she finally lost her virginity and got better again. what i need is the touch of a man, and then ill be good too...hahahaha do i totally sound like a loony now? maybe i am, maybe this is the slow documentation of my going insane.

anyhow, from the totally sane part of me, i also want to say that tomorrow is valentines day and because ive never had a valentine, i have nothing to compare tomorrow to other than another day, but the difference with tomorrow is and the past valentines days is that i am going to philadelphia to see Lia. I am very excited by this because not only do i love lia very much and would love to spend cupid day with her, but i have heard so much about this city and although ive gone a few times to shows, ive never actually goneeeee to philadelphia. my friends who frequent the philli warehouses often compare it to the lower east side so hopefully, i will love the city as much as everyone does. the past year of my life has been very philadelphia themed. my ex left me for philadelphia, my cousin discovered philadelphia and made a new group of friends there who evidently are friends of friends of absolutely everyone i know, making this world that much smaller for me, and now i get to see it for myself. i will write about my philli adventures when i get back.